I’m sorry, I couldn’t actually write a new chapter/story/whatever- I did something else,though, I came up with a storyline for an entire novel, although its by no means finished, I’m sort of at the three-quarter mark right now. I like it, I think it’s nice-can’t say more than that about my own ideas, of course- but it doesn’t have nearly enough shock value or totally outlandish ideas. Right now, unless I write it really well or something, it would turn out like a very conventional SF/F story, the kind that would be very interesting indeed if written by a Clarke or Asimov but only mildly entertaining if left in the hands of the rest of us. So I’m posting a little skit i did a LOOOONG time back(when making fantasies of this sort was so much fun!), recycled from deviant art (www.nikcarnate.deviantart.com). It has a few barely edited but (I think) interesting photos, so feel free to visit if you’re bored. This one isn’t exactly erotic(sorry again!), although the implications are fairly obvious.
“I’ve never actually done this before…”
“You’ve never ironed clothes before?”
“Well, I’ve done a few pairs when the maid was sick and there was no other choice, but no, I have never willingly ironed my whole wardrobe before. And I’ve never done a dress, either.”
“Oh come on, it’s not that weird!”
“Aww…well, it’s really not that hard, baby… Here, let me show you.”
“I KNOW how to do it!!! I just said I haven’t had that much practice. You know, just so you don’t nag at me if it’s not perfect or anything.”
“I don’t NAG!”
“I know, I just said…”
“My MOTHER nags. I don’t nag.”
“Well, not too much…”
“Why are you being mean!?”
“Are you doing this so we can pretend to have a fight and have really good make-up sex? I’m good, but when I don’t know the gameplan I tend to get worried.”
“Aww, my little baby looks so cute when she sulks.”
A man and a woman, lying sideways on a bed, covers upto their chests. The woman is making low sleepy moans. The man is running his fingers through her hair. His hand slides down to her hips under the covers, and the woman turns over.
“Did you know there are couples- couples who have been together for ages, married couples- who set their alarms to wake up about 15 minutes apart, less than an hour before they have to actually get up, wash their face and brush their teeth and gargle and floss and come back and lie down and pretend that’s exactly how they look when they wake up every morning?”
“Me, I think it’s weirdly romantic. You know, how they still care about being good for their partner. But when I mentioned it to my friend she said that’s because they’re not open enough, and they’re still afraid to reveal themselves to each other.”
She pushes him on his back and slides on top of him.
“What do you think?”
“Hmm… tricky one.”
“You have to answer. Would you want me to do all that so I’ll be beautiful for you in the morning?”
“What? You want me to get up early every day just so you’ll see me as better than I really am?”
“You just said you want me to.”
“I said sure. Sure means I’m agreeing with you. It means you still love me after I say it. That’s the whole point of sure. Not-” He hugs and kisses her. “This. There. Think you can make breakfast today?”
“Today? I do it everyday!”
“Well, you never ask me first.”
“Fine. Just wait for tomorrow.”
“I love you, sweetheart.”
“I love you too, darling.”
“Wanna make out?”
“Wait, I’ll just go brush my teeth. You should, too!”
PS: This came up a few posts back as well, so I just thought I’d reiterate: I know how to iron. Just imperfectly. And I have very little practice. It’s not a crime.