Where to Get your Freak On

Not too many surprises here, right?

Sociosexuality vs National Sex Ratio

Sociosexuality is a concept in social psychology that refers to how favorable people are to sex outside of commitment.  It can be measured by answers to questions such as “I can imagine myself being comfortable and enjoying “casual” sex with different partners” (agree strongly to disagree strongly) or “Sex without love is ok,” as well as with objective measures such as the number of sexual partners a person has had.  A low score indicates subjects who favor monogamous, long-term, high-investment relationships.  A high score indicates subjects more favorable to sex for pleasure’s sake alone. with less regard to commitment.  On average, males have higher sociosexuality scores than females but sociosexuality scores for females vary widely across countries.

(Via MR.)

Batting for the Other Team

(Or insert the euphemism of your choice.)

OkCupid has another interesting post, this time on gay sex vs straight sex. Lots of random interesting findings, and of course all of this is very specific to the US and probably even just urban US for the most part, but this struck out:

Men:

Women:

Now, that is a HUGE differential. Not only have almost thrice as many women had/considered having gay sex, they are also far more likely (1.5, by a crude calculation) to enjoy themselves. I thought that was just a movie thing! Is it just that the social attitudes towards lesbianism is to treat it as “play”, whereas male sexual “experimentation” is treated as far more alarming? Or is it because it really is a lot more fun for women? 🙂

Also-and this is pretty depressing- from the charts given in the next part of the article, I think I would much rather go out with a gay woman than a straight one. (Apart from the whole sex bit, of course.)

Sexual Dystopia

There’s an interesting if not very useful (I think, for the purposes I assume he’s doing it for) post by Eliezer up at Overcoming Bias. It would make a reasonably interesting meme, I suppose. The idea is this: you look at various aspects of our lives( he takes economic, sexual, governmental, technological and cognitive) and write down whatthat aspect would be like in a utopic society, a dystopic society and what he calls a ‘weirdtopic” society, which is something that may be totally creepy or weird but may or may not be “better”.* He seeded the discussion by putting the first 2 of each, and kept his ‘weirdtopic” ideas to himself. I got a laugh out of his idea of sexual dystopia:

  • Dystopia: 10% of women have never had an orgasm.  States adopt laws to ban gay marriage.  Prostitution illegal.

*The idea being that if anyone from,say, 2 centuries ago was teleported to this time, he/she would be totally repelled and disgusted, although we would almost certainly agree that Now is better than Then, for pretty much most of Now compared with most of Then, if not just some sections against others.

[Finger](And I’m Sure You Know Which One)

Taken from Great Moments in Framing. Read the article, if you don’t think the picture justifies my title.

Also see a very interesting post by Scott Aaronson, from where I got the link in the first place:

Consider the following template, which (with small variations) might describe a third of the world’s movies and novels:

  1. Girl, the protagonist, is set to marry the well-off, educated Dependable Guy, who does something insufferable for a living such as working.  Girl’s parents strongly favor this union.
  2. Girl meets (or re-meets) Dashing Artist Guy, who steals her heart away.  In the closing scene, Girl and DAG walk happily into the sunset; Dependable Guy is not shown.

[…](The writers stack the odds)
in Dashing Artist Guy’s favor by making Dependable Guy some combination of mean, old, lecherous, ugly, humorless, or vengeful, or by making Girl’s marriage to him a forced one. (Think of Cal in Titanic or Lazar Wolf in Fiddler on the Roof.) In the more interesting variants, Dependable Guy might have none of the negative qualities, and Girl might be shown agonizing over a genuine choice—but she still always goes for DAG in the end.
Interestingly, the writers invariably stack the deck further by portraying DAG as 100% committed to Girl—even though a realistic assessment might find that if DAG stole one heart, then he can and will steal plenty of others as well, and thus the notion of Girl and DAG living together happily ever after may simply represent audience members’ wish-fulfillment fantasy. Indeed, skepticism about DAG’s long-term motives might be the reason Girl’s parents favor Dependable Guy.

I find it a little ironic that I’m supporting something that holds up what is a de-facto arranged marriage as a more sensible alternative, but I console myself by thinking that people who know me (or regular readers here, for that matter) will understand the nuances of the situation.

A Day in the Life of…

I’m sorry, I couldn’t actually write a new chapter/story/whatever- I did something else,though, I came up with a storyline for an entire novel, although its by no means finished, I’m sort of at the three-quarter mark right now. I like it, I think it’s nice-can’t say more than that about my own ideas, of course- but it doesn’t have nearly enough shock value or totally outlandish ideas. Right now, unless I write it really well or something, it would turn out like a very conventional SF/F story, the kind that would be very interesting indeed if written by a Clarke or Asimov but only mildly entertaining if left in the hands of the rest of us. So I’m posting a little skit i did a LOOOONG time back(when making fantasies of this sort was so much fun!), recycled from deviant art (www.nikcarnate.deviantart.com). It has a few barely edited but (I think) interesting photos, so feel free to visit if you’re bored. This one isn’t exactly erotic(sorry again!), although the implications are fairly obvious.

“I’ve never actually done this before…”
“You’ve never ironed clothes before?”
“Well, I’ve done a few pairs when the maid was sick and there was no other choice, but no, I have never willingly ironed my whole wardrobe before. And I’ve never done a dress, either.”
“Seriously?”
“Oh come on, it’s not that weird!”
“Aww…well, it’s really not that hard, baby… Here, let me show you.”
“I KNOW how to do it!!! I just said I haven’t had that much practice. You know, just so you don’t nag at me if it’s not perfect or anything.”
“I don’t NAG!”
“I know, I just said…”
“My MOTHER nags. I don’t nag.”
“Well, not too much…”
“Why are you being mean!?”
“I’m not!”
“Are too.”
“Are you doing this so we can pretend to have a fight and have really good make-up sex? I’m good, but when I don’t know the gameplan I tend to get worried.”
“Humph!”
“Aww, my little baby looks so cute when she sulks.”
“HUMPH!”

A man and a woman, lying sideways on a bed, covers upto their chests. The woman is making low sleepy moans. The man is running his fingers through her hair. His hand slides down to her hips under the covers, and the woman turns over.

“Did you know there are couples- couples who have been together for ages, married couples- who set their alarms to wake up about 15 minutes apart, less than an hour before they have to actually get up, wash their face and brush their teeth and gargle and floss and come back and lie down and pretend that’s exactly how they look when they wake up every morning?”
He laughs.
“Me, I think it’s weirdly romantic. You know, how they still care about being good for their partner. But when I mentioned it to my friend she said that’s because they’re not open enough, and they’re still afraid to reveal themselves to each other.”
She pushes him on his back and slides on top of him.
“What do you think?”
“Hmm… tricky one.”
“You have to answer. Would you want me to do all that so I’ll be beautiful for you in the morning?”
“Sure…”
“What? You want me to get up early every day just so you’ll see me as better than I really am?”
“Or not…”
“You just said you want me to.”
“I said sure. Sure means I’m agreeing with you. It means you still love me after I say it. That’s the whole point of sure. Not-” He hugs and kisses her. “This. There. Think you can make breakfast today?”
“Today? I do it everyday!”
“Well, you never ask me first.”
“Fine. Just wait for tomorrow.”
“I love you, sweetheart.”
“I love you too, darling.”
“Wanna make out?”
“Wait, I’ll just go brush my teeth. You should, too!”

PS: This came up a few posts back as well, so I just thought I’d reiterate: I know how to iron. Just imperfectly. And I have very little practice. It’s not a crime.

Comic Love

Picked up on BoingBoing, the story of how…well, the title’s pretty clear.

Next post, my dreams of a comic-reading,SF-crazy, game-playing,erotica-writing sex goddess.

J.W.E.: True Comic Story #1: How The Hulk Almost Got Me Laid

Hi Jeremy, How are you? her missive began. As for me, I am cool. This is my first letter to you and I have seen your name in the magazine.
The magazine? What magazine, I asked, curled on my bed, secretively reading her letter for the twentieth time. What was this crazy, Jamaican girl talking about? I’m not in any magazine!
Then it hit me.
The Incredible Hulk #212. The first appearance of Frank Payne, The Constrictor, a cover by Rich Buckler and Ernie Chan, the very issue that heralded my short-lived run as an overly-effusive comic book letter writer. I quickly ramped it up from this nervously concise debut, in the weeks to come finding myself rhapsodizing ineloquently to Chris Claremont about the “emotional power” of The Man-Thing mythos, then digging at the editors of Mike Grell’s The Warlord for causing me to become so enraptured by the storyline that I let my bowl of Rice Krispies go soggy while reading in bed – true story, I swear.

Ah, to live again the life of a teenage comic book fan, to so lovingly sculpt my little communiqués, posting them with the hopes that people I didn’t know might verify their existence by reading them, perhaps even to comment upon them. Sigh. How desperately quaint we were, not so long ago. How much we’ve all changed. But, please forgive me, I’m completely forgetting my lustful longing for Wendy Wilson.

Done to death, I know…

But hey, its an omni-present theme for a teenage boy. Also courtesy K5 . On “How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love my Hand”…pretty obvious, I should think, so no explanations, just check it out:

A “Technical” Virgin’s Story

Thats my own title, his is the “Love My Hand” bit. If you ask me, its sour grapes. know…I used to go by the same philosophy (hmm….?I think I still do, I’m no longer resigned to it, thats all)

Ciao…

Nikhil